Escape

Wow, I'm headed into the last week of this fast now. And I must admit, these last several days have been the most difficult. I'm sure it's only going to get worse. Lord, with March Madness coming up (started) I'm afraid of how much time I'm going to be able to spend with You. I know that I could force myself to take a break from the games and pray and read and be with You. The problem is, my thoughts won't really be with You. Help me to find some time to be with You.

And the tiredness, that's something I never really considered when I entered into this fast. If I don't get the sleep I need it's really hard to have any type of energy. I'm like a walking zombie. And right now I am lacking the sleep that I need. It's making it hard to concentrate on anything for an extended period of time. Whether it be school, or my wife talking about her day, my friends talking about their concerns; my mind is just tired. I feel like I need an escape from all of this.

Here's the deal: You've already shown me what that escape can be, the love and silence and time spent in Your presence. That's been what so much of this fast has been about. How do I gain self-control? By spending more of my time under Your control. How do I escape life's trials? By retreating to the warmth of Your presence.

But when I'm in Your presence, I always feel like I need to come away with some new truth. When I am refreshed and well-rested, that is invigorating and life-giving. But when I am physically tired and drained, it's like writing an essay for your required college English class at 3:00 in the morning. But in relationships, do you always have to "get" something from each and every conversation? Don't I have wonderful nights of rest with Courtney where I simply lay in bed with her, arm around her waist, and sleep? If I take our relationship seriously as a relationship, can I call Your presence to simply be with me as I refresh my body?

I hope so... I believe so. I need rest now and I need to be with You. There doesn't seem to be enough hours in the day to do them both apart, so come down and be with me as I put them both together.