In the Rustling Grass...

What is amazing to me? That when I turn my attention to You, I can hardly find where you are not. I love this line from the mewithoutYou song, The Sun and the Moon:

"I used to wonder where You are-
these days I can't find where You're not!"

Just at the beginning of this week, I read Psalm 42 more as a plea than a declaration, "When can I meet with God?" Or, even more accurately, "Where can I meet with God?" Sitting here just 3 days later, You are swarming around me. Note to my future self, as you are perhaps re-reading to remember. It started with remembrance of what You had done, it flowed into prayer, it became attention. And now you speak to me everywhere.

This morning, my grandmother gave me some children's CDs that her and grandpa used to keep in the car for us grandkids. Well, I guess I was too old for them, but considering that they still have elementary aged grandchildren now, these CDs have gone through a lot of uses. Anyways, most of the grandkids are upper elementary or middle school now, with two exceptions, and so they handed the CDs over. As Gideon and I listened to them in the van while running errands, I was struck by a song from the "Hymns" album (which is kids singing old hymns!)

"This is my Father's world
O let me ne'er forget
That though the wrong seems oft so strong
God is the ruler yet."

What a simple and strong statement of hope. And there You were, leaping out of the speakers in the Montana and speaking to me again. In fact, the song caught my attention with the line, "In the rustling grass I hear Him pass / He speaks to me everywhere." You have been speaking to me everywhere. And it is not that the song is new. It's not that I've never heard the words before. It seems that I'm just listening with new ears.

Thank You for friends. There is no doubt that my renewal was spearheaded by Bryan's decision to go seek You in the mountains, er, the lakes of Pokagon. I hope that You are making the morning light and the lily white declare Your praise before him this morning. Thank You for the desire that rumbles within us. My greatest prayer is that You come in Spirit and power and fulfill the longing that has been empty.

And I know I need to stay committed as well. The countless short prayers for Bryan, then for Exodus, have now bled into a nice fabric of conversation throughout last night and this morning. It has turned my attention to You. I will soon go about the chores of the day, cleaning and straightening and throwing away. Don't let me lose our conversation. I know I have responsibility in that.

Before I leave this post, let me pray for the day.

Father,
You have been amazing.
You are amazing.
You will be amazing.
Open our eyes to that wonder.
Let that wonder fill our days and actions.
Let Your kingdom come into this world.
Fill us today with Your Spirit, and meet our material needs.
Protect us from the "sinister" as we seek You.
All power and glory and honor to You.
In the name of Christ Jesus,
Amen.

All Bright and Beautiful

2 Corinthians 4-5

What's the brightest thing people see when they look or listen to me?

Do I really let myself be a simple jar of clay, or do I adorn myself so that people can see me? Do people see anything bright in me at all?

I'd like to say that people see the light of Christ in my life, like The Message translation says, "all bright and beautiful." I'm not sure. At school, when I'm teaching Bible I'm always worried that I'm making the Bible confusing and boring. That's really difficult for me to handle because I find the word of God so inspiring (most of the time). I want the message of Christ to shine out of me.

So the interesting thing is that Paul notes here in the passage that outwardly they look beat and worn down, but inwardly they are being renewed. I'm sure that when the heart, mind and soul are being renewed, then the energy of God flows out of that renewed spirit and people see the beautiful message of Christ in the enthusiasm and life coming out of that. The thing that I've worried about for myself is that outwardly I might look in good shape, but inwardly is where I've been worn down. Then, no matter what my "jar of clay" might look like, the light isn't shining out of my life.

Yesterday and today have been really good though. I really appreciate getting back into the word like this. Although I'm sure at some point it will get old and feel like a responsibility and a pressure more than renewal and pleasure. Help me keep a good attitude toward this study time. It's been interesting this week for sure, as I've been going through a really stressful time at work I haven't felt the stress too badly. So, perhaps this is the beginning of my "bright" inward renewal.

Whatever it is, my prayer has been "Speak to me, speak through me." Perhaps at times that speaking through me needs to be silent, just letting You shine through my attitude and actions. I pray that I am representing You to others, whether consciously or unconsciously, let my life begin to truly shine. Really speak to me. Let me hear the Word. Then let others see You, my precious God, speaking in my life, "all bright and beautiful." Amen.

Speak and Fill

Pay attention was the theme of my last conversation here with You. This past Sunday I preached about doing what we can to pursue the personal side of our relationship with You. These two things have been working through my mind the last week then as I got to be a stay at home dad and watch Gideon.

You know that the whole week was taken up with following around our energetic one and a half year old. I was unaware the attention that it takes to watch him throughout a whole day with no one else around. God bless Julie for what she does when she watches all four of the kids at once! I often did not get to this morning time of prayer, reading and conversation. And yet, You and I were able to find in between times and "converse." That was quite important to me in this time of pursuit.

So, today, I come to You with a time-tested request. I know that I'm often coming to this space with an idea of what I want, but equally as much I just ramble through thoughts and complaints. Today, I'm crystal clear on two things. These will be the focus of my prayers for weeks (hopefully, You'll begin to answer them too!) First of all, my simple repetitive prayer: Speak to me, speak through me. Speak to my spirit, speak to my mind, and the speak through my words and actions to others. Reveal Yourself to me, then reveal Yourself to others through me. Secondly though, something that I realized the importance of yesterday. Fill Exodus Community with Your Spirit. Let the wind blow upon our congregation and cause us to reflect and renew! I don't always know where You will lead, but I have found and must remember that You are trustworthy. Do not let our leaders (including me) laziness, disinterest and other plights remove Your Spirit from our church's life. Restore that wonder, that freshness; infuse the Spirit into all we do.

This is my cry this morning. Amen.