On Comfort and Letters

2 Corinthians 1-3

This site is a lot of things for me. It is a place to basically type out my prayers to You. It has been a place for me to study the Scripture with You. It has been a place for me to write about You. My reading schedule this year through Scripture hasn't been very helpful, and so today we're going to change it a little bit. I've been studying by genres of Biblical literature, but looking at a different genre each, going through a rotation. It's just one that I found on the internet, but the problem is that I have very little continuity. So it's hard to connect from day to day. So I'm reading a lot of different Scriptures but feeling like the narrative is getting lost.

Today I'm going to change a bit and focus on one genre until I finish it. The first genre I'm going to look into is the Epistles. There is a reason too. I want to see the way that Paul, James, Peter, and others talked to the early churches. Since I'm involved in a young church, that needs much encouragement at times, maybe some direction as well, how did they do it and what were they concerned about. Okay, enough chronicling of purpose, off we go!

Two things strike me today about this Scripture, one is the idea of comfort and the other is the concept of being a letter.

First, comfort. I've been feeling lately a lack of comfort, a life full of stress, and I've been looking everywhere for affirmation. I've talked to You about this before, and You were so good as to remind me that "I am Your son, You are well pleased." At times, however, I am stubborn in my search for human validation. I get some, sometimes, but far less consistently than if I would count on You. Paul though, praises You as the God of all compassion and comfort, who comforts us in our troubles. And then that comfort can be extended from us to others.

So what I need is continual compassion and comfort in order to lead Exodus. The pressure has become amazing, and what I've noticed is that I have less and less comfort and compassion to give to others. Actually, I have less and less capacity for relationship in general. That has really been irking me, Lord, since relationship is the complete reason of starting Exodus. I need that real sense of Your comfort then, of our relationship, so that I can extend it to others. Please, help remind me throughout the day.

Secondly, there is the idea of being a letter. All of Exodus is a letter, wide open for others to read. What do people read there on a regular basis? We would like people to read: Deliverance, Community, Knowledge, and Land. And I think that has been evident to some. I think GG would read Deliverance. I think that the families we helped with unemployment would read Deliverance. I think that some of us might read Community. Knowledge, I'm not sure. I think most of us see that is too hard right now. It's difficult to keep the balance for sure. And as for the whole cycle, DCKL, I don't think it could be read in its entirety through our community. Plus, I think there are other distracting and demoralizing things that others would read in us. Or at least that when I "open the book" that is Exodus, I read some things I'd rather not.

How can I lead so that we all read the same way? Rejoicing in the way You have lived the DCKL for us so that we can live the DCKL for others, that is what I want our community to say. Comfort me in my feelings of shortcoming this morning, and let this be a place of renewal and new beginning, instead of just a mournful place.

I love You, and thanks for the listening ear. Now, speak to me, speak through me. My Lord, Amen.

God of Mercy and Compassion

Scripture Reading:
Exodus 33-35

There's a line of Scripture that has bothered me for a long time, and I came across it again today. The verse is Exodus 33:19 -

"And the LORD said, "I will cause all my goodness to pass in front of you, and I will proclaim my name, the LORD, in your presence. I will have mercy on whom I will have mercy, and I will have compassion on whom I will have compassion."

I guess I understand what's going on here, when I look at it in context. Moses has asked to see Your glory, and You agree. Perhaps, probably, this statement about having mercy on whom You will have mercy is simply to emphasize to Moses that even though You are granting his request, You are the one who is ultimately in control. As Robert Altar says in his commentary, Your goodness is not amenable to human prediction, calculation, or manipulation. Even though Moses had found favor in Your eyes, and in this case You were granting his requests, in the end You cannot be told what to do. I suppose that is really the meaning of what's going on here. Basically that You are all powerful, we should not believe that any ritual, prayer, or suggestion will force You to do what we desire.

What bothers me about the passage is sinking a little in the light of this new understanding, but it still stirs my soul to want to question You slightly. The way that this is worded makes it seem like You may choose not to have compassion on some people, that You may choose not to have mercy on some people. I suppose that there are lots of logical reasons why You wouldn't have compassion on people (like they refuse Your mercy and grace, and they harden their hearts against You, like Pharaoh). Still, just saying that there are those who don't receive Your mercy and compassion, that seems so out of character with You. You know, and if You're the one who ultimately decided who You dole out Your care too, does our attitude and such even matter?

I know that there are other glorious sides to You as well, that may negate this weird mystery problem. I know that consistently throughout the Scriptures You are a God who limits Yourself for our sake. Though You have the right and the power to control everything You often bend to answer the prayers of the ones who love You, You allow us the freedom of choice, and eventually in the story of Scripture, You limit Yourself to human form and come to be with us. As far as this mercy and compassion question goes, perhaps there are limits involved here as well. Perhaps You allow Yourself to be limited to answering the prayers of those who cry out, though You could simply ignore them.

Maybe that is another great lesson of praise for me today (why do I consistently say maybe when I'm talking with You. Maybe because I want to know You, but I hesitate to say I've got it all figured out.) What I mean by a lesson of praise is that if You have the right and the ability to do whatever the heck You want, and then You choose to limit Your self to answering my prayer. That's incredible!

My prayer for today? Have mercy and compassion on Your people, just like Moses prayed. I'm not sure that we've angered You enough that You don't want to go with us, but just like Moses begged, You have to go with us. Life isn't really worth living if You aren't walking with us. So be compassionate as You are Lord, be gracious as You are, and come with us wherever we are going today.