Showing posts with label day twenty-seven. Show all posts
Showing posts with label day twenty-seven. Show all posts

Monday, March 3, 2008

Entrusting Myself to Him

MONDAY 2.3.08 - 1 PETER 2:23-25
When they hurled their insults at him, he did not retaliate; when he suffered, he mad no threats. Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly. "He himself bore our sins" in his body on the cross, so that we might die to sins and live for righteousness; "by his wounds you have been healed." For "you were like sheep going astray," but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.

Today I think I'll go through this Scripture using lectio divina form in my entry as well as my reading.

READ. "When they hurled their insult at him, he did not retaliate..." This would have been the reaction of the world, this would have been an accepted response, this would have been even common sense. "Instead, he entrusted..." Instead implies that there is a different way, a different action. "He himself bore our sins..." You died for our sins, perhaps another way of saying the reactions of the world, You died for those reactions and actions of ours that are like the worlds. "so that we might to sins and live for righteousness..." Again, You died so that we do not have to retaliate, but can trust. You died so that we might not threaten, but may trust. "You were like sheep..." And we needed You to die for that and need to be continually reminded that You died for that, for we are constantly tempted to walk the way of the world, the path of retaliation and threatening and protecting what is ours, but You have given us an example and a way back to Your paths.

THINK. What word or phrase really jumps out at me? "Instead, he entrusted himself to him who judges justly." The phrase before this talks about when You suffered Lord Jesus, that You made no blustery threats. You didn't threaten God, You didn't threaten man, You didn't threaten Yourself as You dealt with the suffering. When I suffer, I believe I am fairly just in not lashing out at others, but how often my reaction to suffering is to lash out at You, or even at myself.

Recently, there has certainly been a conviction of mine that I am to persevere through sufferings. Again, I hardly know what this means and in my mind its been a lot like, "well, when we suffer I guess we sit back and take it on the chin." To sum up what it feels like to me, I would say that we I think of persevering through trials, it seems very passive. However, this phrase that is jumping out at me, in this phrase entrust is a verb. It is a verb set counter to the verbs of retaliate and making threats. Both retaliation and making threats are active, so to set this word entrust opposite of them makes me feel that it is active as well. And let's be honest, it certainly takes some effort to trust through hardships and through suffering.

I think this "entrusting" theme fits in well with the rapidly more complete focus of my fast: joy. The book of James tells us to face trials with joy. Here Jesus faced suffering and trials with trust. I think the two of these are deeply wrapped up in one another. I listened to Rob Bell preach on joy on the way home from the ski trip this last weekend. He said one of the keys to joy is an appreciation for the gifts that we've already been given. Perhaps this is a key action of trust. Perhaps when trials and sufferings come, we can look back to what You have given us that is good, actively seeking out the places of blessing in our life and actively giving thanks. This goodness and this grace of Yours then allows us to trust that You are just, and that You will work through the bad in our present circumstances to give us more to praise about on the other side of the trial.

PRAY. Dear God, my Father. I want to take time to sift through the gifts You've given in my life. I have a wife that I love and who loves me back, even where's a t-shirt that proclaims it. I have a son who is healthy, adorable, and I love him. I have a community that will struggle for one another, who wants to pick me up when I am down, and who reaches out to one another. I have seen You work tremendously through them, as they have grown healthy in faith from places of hurt. I have all the provisions of money, food, and shelter that I could ask for. Perhaps You are making a way for me to find even more contentment and excitement in my job. You are a God of blessings, thank You, thank You, thank You.

Therefore, I trust where You will lead Exodus. I trust You in helping me raise my son. I trust You with areas of my sexuality and lust that I struggle with, if I follow Your commands these will be healthier and whole. Please do not let me be dragged aside by lies of more contentment, excitement, or fulfillment, for life has proven to me that all these things are better satisfied by You than by the sins of this world. You are the one who makes all things redeemed and whole, therefore I will trust You.

LIVE. How will I live this out today? Simple, a way to keep my mind on You. Every hour throughout the day I am going to write on a note card a blessing that came from You in the past hour. I trust that You will bring me through this day in joy!

Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Like a Dog with His Bone

I'm starting to realize how You've been changing me and working in me throughout these forty days Lord. I'm starting to realize how it is all coming together, and it's amazing.

You started by telling me to savor my experience, a lesson that could be applied to a lot of things.

Then you lead me through a tough time of realizing the necessity of balance between silently waiting and moving to do, where I realized that to do Your will, I'm going to need to slow down significantly, lingering over Your touch in my life.

You lead me to a realization that I need to put my feet on the floor and hold things up in You. It is the way of fear-of-the-Lord.

As You did this, You started to lead me in considering my next forty days. You convicted me that it should be one of silence and study.

And today You've started moving me again in that way. In combining all the stuff that I've been learning into one central concept. It's a concept that I have been dabbling with and now am extremely excited to move into full force. You have brought me to begin a new type of relationsip with You and Your Word. You are teaching me to "Eat Your Book."

That's right, like a dog delighting in his bone so I should savor, linger, roll my tongue around, and hold onto the words of Your Word. I am seeing (with the help of Eugene) that spiritual writing (we accept that the writing of the Bible is guided by the Holy Spirit) requires spiritual reading. This spiritual reading means taking my time, moving off like a dog taking his bone to a private place, and devouring the Words of Scripture.

This means finding silence and space. You were already moving me toward this with the prompting of my next forty days. This morning I found myself caught up in this Scripture:

Lamentations 3:25-28: The LORD is good to those whose hope is in him, to the one who seeks him; it is good to wait quietly for the salvation of the LORD. It is good for a man to bear the yoke while he is young. Let him sit alone in silence, for the LORD has laid it on him.

Yes Lord, You have laid it on me to sit alone in silence, to wait quietly for my salvation. And in so waiting on the Spirit, to take up the Holy Text and savor it, linger over it, taste it deep in my soul. How certainly it will be sweet as honey on my lips, and there will be days where it will cause my stomach to be bitter. But I am awakened by the thought of taste.

And of course, a fast where I have refrained from eating. In the end, God of amazing foresight, You are teaching me that it is not about refraining from eating. Instead, taste and appetite are Your gifts, and I should instead turn these metaphors directly to Your Book. With the true hunger that I have for food for my body near day thirty, let me always have that hunger for Your Word. And let me expect for it to be quenched as I eat Your Book.

Oh God, Where Are You Now?

Sustained time in Your presence is so elusive. I don't want to feel like I'm forever questioning You, forever falling away from You, forever losing touch with where You are, but sometimes I think that either You or I are moving way too fast for each other. I mean, maybe once or twice a day our thoughts entwine for several seconds, minutes if I'm lucky, and then I'm on my way or You pick up and move.

It's funny, those seconds of intersection keep me going, leep me struggling. Yet, somedays I just want to find You and know You without the enormous struggle that it is involved. Sometimes I think that despite Jesus, we're no closer to You than the priests who had to walk through all the purification rituals.

So is that really the problem with sustained presence? Would it really kill me like it could to the Old Testament priests? Be so overwhelming that I couldn't stand it? God one other thing that I've learned over the course of this forty days is how powerful and strong You really are. But my prayer is that I can see that power that is being used not necessarily to humble people, but for overwhelming good. There I hope that my community can join You and be on the forefront of seeing the power of God pouring out on the people, places and communities that need salvation. Salvation from poverty, terror, homelessness, whatever it is. I really want to be where You are, the center of Your will.

So where are You right now? How do I connect my heart to Yours? Can You open my ears to hear You more? Can I receive the privilege of action alongside of You? I sit with these questions this morning.