A Theology of Waiting: Day Four

Yesterday, I got on the tennis blog and wrote a long post about what constitutes success as a tennis team. My final verdict in the contemplation was that memories and relationships define success. So what defines success in my faith? Or since we are talking about waiting, what defines success at the end of the process of waiting?

It's an important question, because expectations often throw everything off. If I get really excited about Chinese food and then Courtney comes home and makes my favorite casserole, I'm still going to be a little sad. So it seems that I want to have the right expectations when it comes to this waiting time with You, Lord.

Interestingly, their is some promise of deliverance that goes along with the waiting. It is one of the things that we hope for, to be freed from our sins. But I'm going to say that being freed from your sins cannot be the definition of the success of waiting. Here's why: You are always going to sin. Sure it may be true that the Lord brings us out of an area of severe captivity, but human nature says that if we focus on that, our triumph over one area of temptation, then we will fall victim to another area of temptation. I feel like deliverance is certainly going to happen, it's just not the part that defines the success of our waiting.

The success then all goes back to what we are waiting for. I am waiting for Your presence. Therefore, if You show up, in whatever way that You choose, then my time of waiting has come to fruition. The scary thing (oh, please don't let this happen!) is that You could show up in many ways, like comfort for something that has gone drastically wrong. It wouldn't seem like success because of tragedy, yet it would be an answer to the time of waiting.

The end of Psalm 17 is what got me to thinking all of this. David writes about how he is crying to the Lord, has committed himself not to sin, served the Lord in righteousness, and is hoping for God's deliverance. All of these follow the themes of waiting that I have been contemplating this week. Crying, repentance, obedience, hope. But his final line sums up his view of the success of this prayer.

And I—in righteousness I will see your face; when I awake, I will be satisfied with seeing your likeness.

Satisfaction comes from seeing You. From seeing Your likeness. From being in Your presence. It not in the way You answer requests, the things we gather for ourselves, or even the deliverance that You provide. No, it is simply that we awake and You are there.

How can I live life without optimism then, without satisfaction. For even when I don't feel it, I know that You are there. How can I live my life downcast when the satisfaction we all seek is found in the smallest pleasure, enjoying the presence of our Creator.