I have been on this Lent path for a week now, trying to become more mature as a Christian. Starting with the basics of repentance, I have been trying to leave my selfish ways behind. And in some ways I'm succeeding, in other I am failing. I think that is probably what it means to be human, so I'm not going to be to harsh on myself yet.
But I'm not going to stop trying, either, Lord. One of the areas of maturity was self-control. I do really well at the "no" that is inherent to self-control. For me, I believe self-control has two areas, a "no" and then a "yes." You have to control yourself to say no to things that are bad for you, destructive to faith and following Christ. But then you have to say yes to the things Christ would, helping others, forgiving, going the extra mile, turning the cheek, etc.
As an ascetic worshipper by nature, I do not mind denying myself in order to get closer to You. I have fasted, I have given up things, I have given up vices. I have denied myself access to distractions, giving up television or searching other internet blogs. In the past, I have done these things of denial, and they have been a joy.
But have they changed my attitude of saying yes to difficult things? Not always. I still have trouble doing the things that would make me feel uncomfortable, be difficult, or require a lot of me. For example, I crave my lunches alone. It allows me to think, relax, and recover. And yet, I have many students with missing assignments that I should simply call in to work on those assignments with me, where I can give them help and answer questions in a non-judgmental way. But I love my lunches alone! Or, I am the Bible teacher, and I've been thinking lately that it would be good to have a group of students that regularly prayed for the school. But again, this would have to cut into my time, my alone time, in one way or another. So it doesn't happen.
So my prayer today is simple, let me be more of a yes man. The things that will further Your kingdom, that fall inside Your priorities for me: Let me be self-control enough to say yes to them.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
This is an awesome thought and of course a responsibility. Your dad and I had this decussion this weekend about the things we are ready to "be over" because they are outside of our comfort zone, or the cut into "our" time are often the areas that God uses to mature us and teach us. May my heart be willing to say yes, and if not my heart then change my mind. A change (methamorphis) always begins by changing how we think.
Post a Comment